Motivation Quotation: “No trait is more likely to improve the quality of life than the ability to transform adversity into an enjoyable challenge.” –Mihaly Csikszentmihaly

Motivational Insights: Most people dislike adversity, but enjoy a challenge. So what is the difference between an enjoyable challenge and adversity? Mostly perspective — how we choose to interpret an event in our mind.

Much of our adversity will become an obstacle illusion if we choose to see it as an invigorating challenge rather than as a major difficulty. So how do you do develop the “ability to transform adversity into an enjoyable challenge”?

1) Consistently make an effort. When a problem comes up make a constant, conscious effort to see it as an opportunity instead of an obstacle. Consistently tell yourself: “This is a chance for me to be an overcomer — an incredible winner! There is an exciting way to rise above this obstacle and I will find it!”

2) Consistently ask yourself: “How can I make this situation better?” Collect as many ideas for improving the circumstances as you can. Write them down and then rank them from what you think is the best idea to the worst one. Continue to add to the list as new ideas come to you.

3) Choose the best idea and try to make it work. If it won’t work after a reasonable effort, discard that idea and try to apply the next one. Keep this up until you find an idea that works.

4) See this process as if you were playing a video game. Don’t get upset over the “score”. Just keep playing the “game” of overcoming obstacles and make your personal challenges fun.

Keep this process up and after awhile you will begin to thrive on obstacles. Problems will no longer make you whine. Instead they will make you shine!

Like the ancients, we moderns have our myths and our gods. Myth Of Our Time #2 is the “casual” sex myth. It says: Random sex with various partners is a meaningless recreational activity with no significant consequences and should be encouraged and approved of by society.

But what is “casual” about the act that has the power to create a human being? Bringing another person into the world or killing that person before she is born are both profound acts — anything but “casual”!

And what is “casual” about playing Russian roulette with your life and with your health? People today are dying from sexually transmitted disease. Is that “casual”?

And what is ”casual” about one of the most intimate and intense human experiences. What is “casual” about an experience that is designed to create a deep emotional bond with another human being?

And what is “casual” about using another person for your pleasure with no commitment to or regard for him or her as a human being? How can we “casually” turn a human into a toy?

And what is “casual” about hurting others and hurting society? “Casual” sex results in abandoned children who often suffer for the rest of their lives. It often leaves children in poverty for the government to help raise. It breaks the heart of the one betrayed. It causes public health problems and increases health care costs. It creates guilt that often leads to other self-destructive behaviors like alcohol addiction and drug use. Is any of that “casual”?

Finally, “casual” sex leads to bondage. It is a surrender to cravings and desires that very quickly becomes habitual — a form of slavery. Is anything ”casual” about being a slave to compulsions?

So since random sex is not at all “casual,” why do we as a society call it that? Because we are blindly following a myth that is harped and promoted though out our society: from bill boards to sickovision (TV); from parental example to college professors; from music to movies; from the White House to the Senate; from health departments to health clubs; from medical doctors to scientists; from magazines to newspapers; from “shackin’ up” to “coming out of the closet.” It even makes some people wonder if anybody doesn’t worship at the “casual” sex altar nowadays.

But yes, there are still people who havn’t bought into the cheapo sex myth! And even if you have been captured by this anything but ”casual” myth, you can get set free!

Do you want some Country wisdom? Alan Jackson’s wife, Denise, says: “Yes, we have wealth, fame, fortune; from the outside we have it all. But all that stuff does not bring joy, contentment, happiness or fulfillment.”

So what does bring those joy, contentment, happiness and fulfillment, Denise? The title of her new book answers that question: It’s All About Him (Jesus): Finding The Love Of My Life.

Beverly Keel wrote an inspiring article about Denise and Alan and her new book recently in the Tennessean. Here are four things I got from the article: 1) money and popularity do not bring happiness; 2) adultery is not a harmless, casual activity; 3) heart-felt forgiveness is a powerful tool for personal and family healing; and 4) allowing the living and resurrected Jesus to be the passionate love of your life transforms everything.

Recently The Associated Press reported that Washington, DC now has a compliment machine. No it is not your favorite Senator or Congressman (even though they can really dish out the compliments close to election time). The compliment machine is a red and white striped box on the sidewalk of a busy street in DC.

When people walk by the compliment machine, they are given recorded compliments like: “You have nice eyes.” And: “People are drawn to your positive energy.” There are about 100 compliments which the machine plays over and over.

The compliment machine was invented by Tom Greaves. Tom is a 46 year-old Washington, DC artist.

Now don’t laugh, but I have had a compliment machine for years. Mine is called The Brown Nose Bear. It is a little Teddy Bear about 18 inches high. When you squeeze his paw, he compliments you.

Brown Nose Bear says: “Outstanding.” ”Excellent Thinking.” “You’re brilliant.” “Great idea.” “That’s fabulous.” “Exactly.” “That’s awesome.” ”You’re a genius.”

I just ran through the Bear’s series of compliments three times, and I feel better. Every now and then, when I need a lift, I will pick up Brown Nose Bear and let him talk to me for awhile. It is amazing the power of a compliment, even from a machine.

Scientists finally discover peer pressure! “People who’s friends become obese have a greater chance of also getting too fat, a finding that suggests obesity is socially contagious,” says the Los Angeles Times referring a study recently published in The New England Jouranl of Medicine.

The LA Times article also states: “Other studies have demonstrated that smoking can ripple through groups of friends and that depression can spread among family members.” Did it take modern scientific studies to discover the power of association, commonly known as peer pressure?

King Solomon already knew about the harmful influence of self-destructive friends, 3,000 years ago. If you read his book of Proverbs you will see that Solomon frequently talks about the power of a person’s companions to have a negative influence on his/her lifestyle.

Of course, if we want to we can turn this “recently discovered information” around and use it for our benefit. We can choose to associate with positive people who are working hard to avoid and overcome self-destructive behaviors. And we can minimize our contact with those who are openly engaging in self-destructive behaviors.

If fat is contagious, so is thin! If smoking is contagious, so is non-smoking. If depression is contagious, so are joy and contentment.

You decided every day what behaviors you are going to catch by the people you choose to associate with. Now that science has finally discovered peer pressure, maybe society will begin to put aside some of its self-destruction.